So I rant.

So I rant.

I was reading through some old “notes” of mine on Facebook the other day and this one stood out to me so much that I wanted to change it up a little and rewrite it for this blog. Once again, I am at a point in my life where things are not as I want them to be and all I long for is the future and for these days and months of unrest to be put behind me.

I have a LOT on my mind these days...so I rant...it's what I do best.

As a single mother in her early 30's, the most wonderful notion of knowing what I need romantically is that I no longer go doe eyed into every encounter I have with an attractive member of the opposite sex. Instead I stand armed with a checklist of things that are necessary, unnecessary, forgivable and unforgivable.

First off, forgive me for all my romantic ideals but, I just want someone to challenge me, as well as meet and overcome all the mental obstacles I have built around my heart.

I demand, I desire, I contest. I am a Rubik’s cube of romantic opportunity. I am all intentions, I have plans, I have plans about plans. I will fight, grab and want and I need and want someone to do the same for me. Do not tell me you don’t know, tell me what you want. Tell me that it is working, or it isn't. I can’t read your mind, so I say what’s on mine. Blunt? Maybe. Or maybe I just know that moments are precious and if I have expectations then I won’t waste your time trying to find out what I want.

Fight for me. Because I will fight for you.

I want a confidante. I want someone who will grab me up, kiss me {long} and laugh loudly with me. Be silly with me. Touch my elbow, or arm. Let me know that you, like me, sometimes just have to reach out and touch. Double check, that this, us, is as real as it’ll ever be. 

I don’t want the moon, never have, never will. Don’t bring a boombox under my window. Don’t even pick me up after my sister’s wedding when everyone forgot my birthday with your perfect hair and your perfect car Jake Ryan. (Name that movie!)

Just indulge me on my silly requests. Get my jokes, even when they are horrible. Understand how my “blog” makes me feel. Listen to my music. Kiss me often. Do something with me. Let’s build something, or make something. I just want it to be about challenging each other, or understanding the horrible days. Let me cry, I am not pleasant or pretty when I am snotty and red faced, but just let me get it out. I will cook for you, I will come home from a long day and throw on some sweats and bitch. I will try to be positive. My life is not a J.Crew weekend Lookbook, nor has it ever been, or do I want it to be. I am not always beautiful in the morning; usually I am not, in fact.

Some days, just be silent because that’s what I need. Whisper a word of wisdom or comfort, because that’s what I need. OR just be with me because that’s what I need.

I am sarcastic. I am sassy, when need be. I will stand up for what I believe. I will fight my own fights. But someone having my back is always nice.

I drink beer, but please don’t buy me a bud light. I drink whiskey. I eat meat. I devour salads. 

I dance, enthusiastically, wildly and passionately.

I want to live in the city, but not too long, I want to settle down in the country, but not too soon. 

I want to instill the same values my parents instilled into me into my son. 

I want someone who adores my son just as much I do. 

I want someone to love my family as much as I do.

I want to fall head over heels and yet I don’t want to give up my independence.

Honestly, I know that when THAT person and I are thrown together by the universe that it won’t be perfect. It will be hard, and it will take work. I can’t wait, though because once you get to know me you know if I want something, really really want something, I work damn hard to get it, or as close as I can get to it.

Black & Gold Love

Black & Gold Love

Lists // Mama Moments.

Lists // Mama Moments.